Unlike my other gay male friends, the majority of my close friends are straight guys. I have found that these guys are the kindest and most accepting people I have ever met. I got to spend some time with these friends recently, and one of them asked why I wasn’t dating. I gave my standard reply of not having enough time for dating. Another, helpful friend at the table asked: “If you have time to make take a last minute trip with us, you certainly have time to go on a date or two.” I looked around the table for some help and noticed that the other guys were all nodding in agreement.
The topic quickly changed, but I spent a lot of time thinking about it. Time wasn’t my constraint. I usually work Monday through Friday and during the week I’m off by four. If I have to work on a Saturday, I’m out by two. I’m done with school, so I don’t have to deal with that anymore, and every other responsibility takes less than three hours a day to complete. Time is not the issue.
After thinking about it, I realized the issue is that all of the needs that a partner would meet are already met by the people in my life, except for sex, but that’s for another post. I thought about the friends I hang out with and saw that each of them fulfilled a need that the typical boyfriend would fulfill.
For today’s magic, I turned my attention to calling the perfect partner to me at the perfect time. I used the best parts of my friends as the model for my perfect man, kind of like Dr. Frankenstein without the creepy surgery.
I laid out a small bad made of red velvet; the kind you can get at any metaphysical shop. I lit a pink candle and cast a quick circle. As I said the following, I visualized one of my friends, moved a token through the flame of the red candle and dropped it in the bag:
“A poker chip, so that he may have his attitude towards money; that it’s a priority, but never THE priority.
A page from the encyclopedia, so he may have his wealth of knowledge.
A match, so he may have your passion.
A beard comb, so that he may have your good looks.
A feather, so that he may have your gentle nature.
A set of dice, so that he may have your playfulness.
A ring, so that he may have your fidelity and commitment to your family.”
I pulled the drawstring on the bag tight.
“As I speak this final rhyme,
May the perfect man come to me at the perfect time.
For the best of all, but most for me,
As I will, so shall it be.”
I bound the magic to the bag with a kiss and opened my circle. I placed the bag in my underwear drawer to keep it out of sight to let the magic manifest.