30 Days of Magic – Day 20: The Perfect Man

Unlike my other gay male friends, the majority of my close friends are straight guys. I have found that these guys are the kindest and most accepting people I have ever met. I got to spend some time with these friends recently, and one of them asked why I wasn’t dating. I gave my standard reply of not having enough time for dating. Another, helpful friend at the table asked: “If you have time to make take a last minute trip with us, you certainly have time to go on a date or two.” I looked around the table for some help and noticed that the other guys were all nodding in agreement.

The topic quickly changed, but I spent a lot of time thinking about it. Time wasn’t my constraint. I usually work Monday through Friday and during the week I’m off by four. If I have to work on a Saturday, I’m out by two. I’m done with school, so I don’t have to deal with that anymore, and every other responsibility takes less than three hours a day to complete. Time is not the issue.

After thinking about it, I realized the issue is that all of the needs that a partner would meet are already met by the people in my life, except for sex, but that’s for another post. I thought about the friends I hang out with and saw that each of them fulfilled a need that the typical boyfriend would fulfill.
For today’s magic, I turned my attention to calling the perfect partner to me at the perfect time. I used the best parts of my friends as the model for my perfect man, kind of like Dr. Frankenstein without the creepy surgery.

I laid out a small bad made of red velvet; the kind you can get at any metaphysical shop. I lit a pink candle and cast a quick circle. As I said the following, I visualized one of my friends, moved a token through the flame of the red candle and dropped it in the bag:

“A poker chip, so that he may have his attitude towards money; that it’s a priority, but never THE priority.
A page from the encyclopedia, so he may have his wealth of knowledge.
A match, so he may have your passion.
A beard comb, so that he may have your good looks.
A feather, so that he may have your gentle nature.
A set of dice, so that he may have your playfulness.
A ring, so that he may have your fidelity and commitment to your family.”

I pulled the drawstring on the bag tight.
“As I speak this final rhyme,

May the perfect man come to me at the perfect time.
For the best of all, but most for me,
As I will, so shall it be.”

I bound the magic to the bag with a kiss and opened my circle. I placed the bag in my underwear drawer to keep it out of sight to let the magic manifest.


30 Days of Magic – Day 6: Summer Heat

In Ohio, winter seems to last forever. When spring finally comes, it feels like in just a blink of an eye, summer swings in with full force. This summer, like every other summer in Ohio, has been a scorcher already. To add insult to injury, my air conditioner stopped a few days ago. Despite buying four fans and opening all the windows, my house is still muggy. Since there was no escape, I decided to use the heat as a symbol of the power of fire.
My love life hasn’t been much of a priority for me for the past few years. Instead, I focused on finishing my master’s degree and on advancing at work. Now that I’m done with school and am in a comfortable spot at work, I decided that a summer fling might be fun.
I laid out three red candles on the floor in a triangle shape. I lit them and stood in the center. I felt the heat of the candles and the heat of summer radiating through my body. I called on the power of fire to draw the perfect lover to me and felt the flames coalesce into a ball of energy around me. I charged this aura of fire with the passion, drive, and sensuality of fire. When it hummed with potential, I condensed the ball of fire into a small orb the size of a ping-pong ball and sent it into the Universe to find the perfect mate. I wiped the sweat from my brow as I muttered: “So mote it be!”