I’ve been extremely anxious over a situation that happened a few weeks ago. Without getting too detailed, it was a huge blow to my ego. It made me feel unwanted, betrayed, and really alone. I spoke with the other people involved and their reasoning for their actions made logical sense, but it still bothered me. When I get stuck in my head like this, I get really emo. So, I sulked and got really depressed and anxious over the situation. This, of course, only made the situation worse. One of the other people involved asked if I was okay and I explained that I was just over-analyzing the situation. Things were okay, but the situation still stands at the forefront of my thoughts. So, I decided to borrow a Tarot spread from the wonderful Dianne Sylvan to get some insight.
Card one – My next step: Death
The Death card never scares me when it pops up in a reading, but today was different. This card symbolizes transformation; letting go of one thing to nourish something else. On one hand, this may mean that I need to move away from the people involved in the situation. On the other hand, it may just mean that I need to let the past situation die and allow everyone the opportunity to prevent it in the future. More easily said than done.
Card two – What hinders me: The Knight of Swords
I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned it here, but I really hate court cards in the Tarot. Anyway, the Knight of Swords tells me that I’m blinded by my desire to have everything be “okay” again, that I’m ignoring the fact that my impatience might be doing more harm than good. Rather than trying to force things to be back in balance, the Knight is telling me that I should let the cards fall where they may. The Knight tells me to balance action with inaction and to act compassionately, rather than out of desperation.
Card three – What helps you: Queen of Cups
Really, another court card?! The Universe has jokes today. The Queen of Cups represents pure compassion to me. She reminds me that I am truly empathetic to those around me and need to focus on nurturing the needs of others, rather than relying on the hurt I am feeling now. I need to let these people know that even though they’ve slighted me that I still care.
Card four – What I must release: 4 of Cups
Sigh. This card echoes what I already know. I must release the feelings of resentment, disappointment, and anger. Since I am so focused on the bad, I am missing the chance to move forward and enjoy what I felt to be missing. My stubbornness is winning out against my desire to be back to “normal.”
Card five – What I must cultivate: Knight of Cups
Maybe I should spend more time with the court cards… This card tells me to cultivate friendliness and love. Despite my shortcomings and my feelings toward the original situation, I must find a remain loving and kind.